Worst Matches

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I think I will never be in a relationship with a mathematician. It's because I'm scared that I'll be exposed for the idiot that I really am. Here's the thing. Most of the time I really don't give a rat's ass about most of everything, but then again, I have enough pride for five people. So if I decide to argue my case, know that not only will I fight till I'm blue in the face, I'll fight until my opponent admits defeat.

Now, if I'm dating a mathematician, I don't want to ever be in the position where he'll be able to make his point using equations and formulas. God forbid that I'll be all "Oh no, you didn't!" (head movement a la Beyonce plus finger snap trademarked by proud sistahs)...and he'll be like, "Well, according to Riemann's hypothesis..." The outcome of that conversation will be absolute crap, at least from my point of view. He'll win hands down and I'll be left with an unstoppable nosebleed. Not the prettiest picture, I must say.

Magicians. Now, there's an interesting demographic. In the middle of a fight, I don't want a guy to be pulling rabbits out of my ass. And if he tries to pull any now-you-see-me-now-you-don't trick on me, I'll slap myself silly six ways till Sunday. Shame on me for picking such a weirdo. Note to self: One weirdo in a relationship is enough. Guess, I'll just have to look for magic someplace else.